Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Hump Day Hollah! Find Your Why...

It’s the Hump-Day Hollah! 

For all you “normal” worker bees out there, Wednesday is your Hump Day!  And, I'm sure as you slide down the workday hill, at some point you resist the urge to find the token “Mike” in your office and make him "guess what day it is...?"  Or maybe you work from home and you ask the same questions to your cat.  Don't lie.  I, on the other hand, am not a normal worker bee.  This bee works for the circus so you know what that means:  my days are nights, my midweek is in the weekend... and my coworkers are Olympic medalists who dress as royalty while backflipping over fire... blindfolded... in rollerblades.  Crazy right?  I mean, who has a Sunday on Wednesday?  Strange world...  

"Disney's Wall-E" 
Well, this weekend I’ve been thinking less about the "M-C-A" more about "The Why”.  After waking up several times this week to sore muscles and an appetite for anything in sight, I began to wonder:  WHY do we do this to ourselves?  WHY do we torture ourselves by running on strange machines that literally move us nowhere?  WHY do we resist the urge to never not be eating chocolate and drinking beer?  WHY don’t we just give up and give in? WHY can’t we all just be old and fat driving around in our scooters drinking our sodas?  WHY is the show still called "24" if it's only coming back for 12 episodes?  WHY?

I actually found my WHY to be pretty simple:  just to be healthy.  Sounds pretty basic, but that simple concept extends so far.  The saying goes, “if you don’t have your health, you don’t have anything,” right?  Don't get me wrong:  I am working to look good in that yellow polka-dot bikini and not have to cling to my cover-up this summer at the beach and that's a great goal to have.  But in the end (or the beginning, for that matter), my why is about how my insides are doing.  The better the insides, the better the outside... And wouldn't you rather spend more time outside than inside a doctor’s office?  With the exception of normal check-ups, even the healthiest of us would rather spend that money earned on Hump Day on something more fun.  Or delicious.  Like chocolate.  Or cookies.  Chocolate covered cookies.  I love chocolate.

"No words... Should've sent a Poet..."
Plus I’ve heard that I’m a much nicer person to be around after a good workout.  Something about endorphins…  When I didn't work out, I used to try to duplicate that bubbly personality with a little coffee or diet soda pick me up, but it was never quite the same.  Well, with the help of AdvoCare's amazing products, I have successfully cut out all coffee and soda from my diet and am working out longer and harder in the gym.  So many birds, one stone!


Lastly, the "WHY" I get asked the most is usually "Why Advocare?"  Like "why are you spending so much time on a new business when you already have your crazy, roller-blade, backflip, blindfolded, full-time Circus job?"  But again, the answer is pretty simple:  AdvoCare rocks!  On top of the effective products (which I experience first hand), AdvoCare has some amazing endorsers like: NFL's Drew Brees & CrossFit's Rich Froning Jr., to name a couple and it can change your life!  Yeah, I know, I hear ya.  And by that I mean I hear the collective skeptical scoff that usually follows a statement like that, but that don't mean it ain't true!  Not to brag (well, maybe just a humble-brag) but just last month I earned an extra $1,000 and I'm on track to earn a $4,000 a month by January of 2015.  That change I was talking about?  That's the one.  Stress goes down and smiles go up!

Let's work together to find your WHY.  You know the drill (upper left hand corner)  or just go ahead and message me, call me, send me a letter and I'd be happy to help!  Why?  'Cause Why shouldn't you feel this way, too?  

Jurassic Park, Wall Balls... what is happening in the world

Another Big Day in the world for this guy...

Mixed metaphor incoming in 3...2...1...

Some people say life is an adventure... I think life is like Jurassic Park... If you want to "spare no expense" and sit in the lap of luxury, sipping cucumber water, with Mr. Hammond and "newman" from friends, then eventually a dinosaur will eat your face.  (literally and metaphorically)

If you work hard, and go toe to toe with the raptors, you'll be rewarded handsomely with bad sequel after bad sequel. 

I recognize that is my 3rd Jurassic Park reference in the last month, but I can't help it.  JP is life... life is JP.  All kidding aside, I find that when I go after it hard I feel better.... win lose or draw I feel better for trying.  If I come up short then I know I did everything I could, and if I win... I am an unbearable sore winner.  So either way,  "whether you're the lion, or the gazelle... when the sun comes up you better be running (metaphorically)". 

Gymski... was the name of the game today.  Woke up a little late, but was able to wrestle my lazy bones into some state of order and get underway for an asskicker of a WOD (workout of the day).  Today was really centered around a 1 rep max on the back squat. 

For anyone not familiar the back squat is when the weight is behind your head on your shoulders and you squat as heavy a weight as possible 1 time.  It sounds ridiculous to people on the outset, but realistically it is a great measure of strength and if done properly with good form, it is not dangerous.  to quote the crossfit gods... "heavy weight isn't dangerous, bad form is dangerous."

I got a PR (personal record) today and I am please as pecan pie in Pittsburgh... and noticeably alliteration happy.  Couldn't be happier with my performance.  That juice carried me through the wod in which we alternated every minute on the minute with "Knees to bar" (or scalings) & Wall balls.  I was seriously juiced because I blasted through and did both sides unbroken.   

Only thing left to say... "yea, I went hard today."  (By the way... I love pictures of babies doing workouts... so don't be surprised.)

So now it is off to lunch with mom and Grams....   Trying to spread the love and make sure everyone gets enough Ryan in their life.  i'll check back in later with an Urban Dictionary Word of the day. 

Get at it boys and girls and get your fitness on!

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Facebook is destroying the world... and portugal is bugging me

So... I have had an unexpected amount of free time on my hands.  This has lead me to peruse the internet and determine some key information fragments.

1)  Facebook is probably going to be the downside of society.  Not so much the actual program itself, as the incidental stupidity it causes.  Back in the days prior to the ever present opportunity to post pictures, you learned one very simple golden rule... "whatever you do... DON'T GET CAUGHT."  This taught children a very real truth about life.  Evidence is the enemy, not parents... and possession is hard to argue against.

I will never claim to have been smarter or less wreckless than kids of today, but I will say this with the utmost certainty.  We were way better at keeping physical evidence to a minimum.  If you wanted to definitively get caught... they had to catch you red handed, in the act. 

Now adays parents just need to wait 6 hours after suspicion and check facebook.  Seriously young'ns... I mean, I say party on and live life the same way people always have... but be smarter than the machine. 

Parents have also gotten complacent.  Since you can just pull up a direct feed of your children's thoughts and actions, I think there is little motivation to try and pre-emptively strike down bad ideas.  Get a head of the ball, and maybe when they say they are going to a sleep over at a friends house on a Friday to do homework...  ask yourself why?  

I don't have kids, so my words lack credibility... but take this for what it's worth.  When they build computer systems, they hire the hackers that found a way around the system... look at me in that vein... just saying kids have never, nor will ever do homework with other people....  

2)  Barstool Sports is some of the funniest stuff on the internet (www.Barstoolsports.com).  I'll give


you this, that from time to time it is written in an overly crass way.  Credit where credit is due though... They find the funniest stuff on the web to comment on. 

Highly recommend it.  I'm not even going into details on why just yet.  I think everyone should just go and read.  Honest opinion its a better read for men than women, but "know your enemy" ladies...  I have to say, if you want to know what is really cooking behind a dude's eyes... this is your glimpse into the male psyche.

3)  Can we all agree that Portugal is actually just the Connecticut of Spain.  I mean it is a cut out of an existing country.  It is in my opinion the equivalent of Connecticut saying --

"Screw it, we are our own country.  We'll look very similar.  Be surrounded on land by another country making us in a bit of a pickle, militarily.  And... we are going to change the language ever so slightly... it'll sound almost the same as the neighboring country, but we will be god damned if you can't tell the difference in the first 3 sentences... We'll lose our minds and be wildly offend."

I have no particular problem with Portugal... Just frustrating how upset they get when you can't identify them as Portuguese, off the bat.  So I say... calm down.

Below is their recent "Drone Program"  getting launched... er maybe not so much.
http://boston.barstoolsports.com/around-barstool/the-portugese-navy-launching-their-drone-program-was-lol-funny/

Monday, April 21, 2014

Courtesy Laughs... the lost art.

Marathon Monday mayhem...

How goes it blogosphere?  All is well here in the commonwealth for


this little monkey.  I ate like a champ yesterday thanks to the Surgeon General's family.  Antipasto, lasagna, sausages of varying meets, ice cream cake... essentially I ate like I was staring at the electric chair and knew the governor was out of town.

Anyone who didn't get the reference will be mocked... so quick advice is to "courtesy laugh" and roll with it...

Side note digression in 3. 2. 1.... what is with that particular skill anyway?  I hate when people don't throw up a courtesy laugh.  Guess what... I rarely find anyone else all that funny, but as a good person I make sure they feel like their ATTEMPT at humor was at least received and noted.  I mean sure I talk a lot... so not all of them are going to be comedy gold, but statistically speaking I am holding several batting titles in the game of "saying funny things". 

I read it as a big F you when people just stare blankly and wait for the conversation to move on... as if to say "no, try again later" with their eyes.  My solution to this has evolved into me just staring right back at them. Typically the person will wait 5 or 6 seconds and then ask if something is wrong.  (try to look at someone in the eyes for 5 seconds in silence... its an eternity)  I will respond with "No, its your turn.  I tried to be funny... you're implying I failed.  So now you show me the correct way to do it... take your time, i'll wait, but please don't break eye contact until I laugh."

That usually ends the conversation.. but they'll think twice about not fake chuckling next time.  I don't expect the world to be adept at courtesy laughs... we're only looking for effort here. 

Anyways... I hit it early today.  Got up, did a few chores, Gymski for a 15 minute Amrap.  Which subsequently left me lying on my back questioning my life's decisions that lead me to voluntarily participating in Crossfit.  Seriously tough work out... for info on it, check the Bayshore Crossfit facebook page... Roof  Stoof my friends. 

Good news is my shoulder, elbows, and knees all felt fine... my respiratory, and cardiological processes definitely not on par... but hey we are looking at silver linings.  All good stuff.

Looks like me and some maritimers are heading into the city to support the home team and the warriors fighting through 26.2 miles of hell.  Good for all who are "doing that which is hard" today.  Get at it.  Here's to them and everyone have fun and be safe out there.

Seacrest Out!

URBAN DICTIONARY - WORD OF THE DAY - MARATHON

Good Morning all...

Boston's own Marathon Monday... Here's to em... I don't even like to drive 26.2 miles.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=marathon&page=2

Marathon
 
The first Marathon was ran by a Greek Soldier named Pheidippides who was sent by the Greek Army to proclaim the victory agianst the Persians but he collapsed dead tired.Now and days Television networks make fun of The Marathon word by using it on continueous Shows like Cartoon's and Dating on Mtv."It's obious,They Can't Run."
 
 
Runner girl:"Hey Ted let's run a 5k."
Ted:"No women im to busy watching the Cops Marathon,it's been going three hours nonstop!"
by Runner Bulldog November 04, 2006
 

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Urban Dictionary - Word of the day - EASTER

Happy Easter!


Urban Dictionary - Word of the Day

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Easter&defid=3876496

It obviously is an adjective that is better than best.

Good Friday... Easter Sunday.

Jesus died on good Friday, but it was even BETTER when he came back to life.

So Easter > Absolute Best.
"Hey man, you going to church for Good Friday?"
"No, way, I'm saving all my church time for Easter Sunday, it's better."
 

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Urban Dictionary - "Just ducky"

and then...

Mar
10
Calm on the surface, paddling like crazy beneath.
When asked how you're doing, "just ducky" is a sarcastic way of saying everything is fine.
by quail58 February 21, 2014
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